It's never all over...

Strangely enough this is not a never-lose-hope kinda post.When I was a kid, I heard people say: "Beta achchhe se padh lo, ek baar base achchha ho gaya to aage achchha karoge". I got it then. I was a decently well student and scored percentage in 80s. When I passed 8th standard, my sister said: "See Saurabh, now is the time to start board studies. It's very important that you score in ICSE". The coaching teacher in 10th standard said: "You will have your high school mark-sheet shown everywhere. Leave all frolic and engage yourself in studies only". I said, OK sir here is my effort. I dumped the whole year in study-bin. Then. Sir, here is my 90% at the end of the story. But the story was just begun. 12th board was the new story. It's a bi thing in one's life, I was told. Relaxed a bit in 11th, but soon it was time to screw again. For boards and simultaneously for JEE-04. During this year I got unprecedentedly large number of this-is-the-time type comment. One uncle who used to be an engineer said: "Beta Saurabh, yahi waqt hai. khub mehnat kar lo fir aage to aish hai aish". Beta Saurabh thought as usual: Right Sir I will do that as I've been doing ma whole life. I remember a day during this year when my sis tagged me hard-working-fool. It was not in this context but as I think it over now it's as much true. Yes, that was what I've been all my life. But the fool was to be fooled more. So JEE people did not select him for JEE-04. One more year of fooling around in a strange new place with all strange new faces. I moved to Kota, Rajasthan for one year and made my life more miserable. But life is a function which takes miseries as input and gives back big things as output. Akbar was King at 14 just because he was born in deserts when his parents had nothing. Not even food and water! This was when I thought This might be the all over point. This might be the end. Came to IIT Kanpur and caried this myth for one more year. Then it was summer of '06. I was seriously caught in a mental paradigm. If this is the end then why not it had ben 2 year back. Why can't it be 4 years hence? Trying to solve this I was reading a book by Mr.Robin Sharma.(Yes, the same you are thinking now). Now my dear. It scraps the question itself. If you want to be happy. It this very moment is the best time. Try to be happy in this moment and apply the same model to next moment and you will never be sad. All the while you sacrifice your present for future and then you realize that these is no future infact. When 'what you think future' comes, it comes in the form of present. So don't you think the present is important than future? SO what's the tip for me? Ho sake to isme jindagi bita do pal jo ye jane wal hai. Think future live present.

Binding my existence to the world

Once I woke up at 6:00 am in the morning as I did sleep early last night. After then I don't remember if I was dreaming or I was thinking awake. All the the thoughts running through my head. This post is more on philosophical note, inspired by the subconcious aquired in Philosophy lectures. Took out the diary and wrote this.
All the world around me and all the reasons and wisdoms and ill-wisdoms are not enough to let me believe that Moksha theory is untrue. For those who say nothing happens for just like that, nothing is without a reason, without a purpose of itself, I say then what is the purpose of our existance? If you say earning or learning of (as most say) being a professional or anything that a person may set for himself, is his purpose, then it is something you WANT. You yourself decided that you wil be/have what you want. How can this be purpose of life. This is the perpose of something which you say "I" and I say "you". Isn't it different from "life". Such purpose changes from purson to person whereas the life which runs in you, runs through all of them, binds them all to the earth, and it makes them feel like living . This is all what is reasoned out by me. But is the thing which I called life same as what Indian Philosophers called ATMA- soul- self. This is still a mystry. But all the happenings to me, my concience and my reasoning, and the world around me are conspiring together to make me belive: YES..